A break in the clouds

I'm not big on New Years Resolutions, I never end up keeping them anyway, but with all that's happened in the last few weeks, I do feel like it's time for some changes for me and some for my family too. I find myself starting 2012 with no job and no clue as to what I want to do next. I may not get to choose, at the end of the day I have three children to feed and bills to pay like everyone else, so it might be a case of taking what comes up.

I was reading this blog today, which in turn led me to another blog where the writer talks about wanting to put more importance on experiences than things or stuff. I could relate to both blogs, although certainly wouldn't be able to compete with the experiences the second blogger was talking about but the idea is the same.
Me and Mr P got to talking on Christmas Eve about how much importance is put on stuff and how we feel some of the excitement has gone from Christmas for some children as they no longer have to wait until Christmas or a Birthday for that special gift. Everything is so accessible now and a good many children get gifts all year round. I'm not ashamed to say I don't include my children in that. They almost always have to wait for things and get some things as gifts that other children just get given for no special reason. Sometimes they have to choose between things for example, a bigger gift or a party. I'm not afraid to tell them they can't have it all, or in fact that I can't afford something. This is one area of my life I don't have any plans for changing. I am proud of my children and their attitude towards money and possessions. I was worried on Christmas Eve that their little piles of gifts looked so small, but as they get older the gifts seem to get smaller and more expensive! I spend the same on each of them and they each had one main presents and a few other smaller gifts. But I needn't have worried as they were all delighted with the gifts they received on Christmas morning and in fact R, my 8 year old said the best gift he got was the quilt I made him (should I send the shiny new iPod back?)

So what will I change?
 I need to find a new job, hopefully it will be something I love. There is one plan I have in mind which involves cake and crafts, that some of you know about, but what I need to work out is whether I have the courage and drive to do it, or if I can live with the sacrifices it will mean making in the early stages...........Hmmmm?

I want us to eat better. Mr P always tells me that I'm ahead in this area, but not ahead enough for my liking. So I want to try more things, different things and I want my children to do the same.

I'm not going to diet. They don't work, at least not long term, and as I have been told, I don't really need to.
I'm a size 12 (can't believe I've published that fact!) I'm not huge as I used to have myself believe and complaining about my slight muffin top or curvaceous bottom is pathetic. If nothing else good came out of that car crash it was this! I'm not going to beat myself up anymore. I'm a 30 something mother of 3 beautiful children with a man who loves me and I'm alive! If my accident had happened differently I would have been lucky to be sat here typing this so no more putting myself down or beating myself up over things that really don't matter, and who's looking at me anyway!! So from now on I'll make an effort every day (this has already been noticed by the children, they thought I was off out on NYE!) and if I feel like wearing stockings or nice undies, then I shall, whatever day of the week it is!

I'm going to be more positive. I suffer from depression (another huge admission) It's not there all the time, but it comes in waves. It's easy to slide when things get you down, they escalate or spiral out of control. 2011 was a pretty bad year all round. It started with my Mum's funeral and ended with me losing my job and having my 'near miss' accident with other negative experiences scattered through the year. So instead of thinking about all the negative stuff (and there was plenty!) I had a think about the good things that happened last year. I thought it would be a short list but actually there were quite a few good things that happened once I started picking through it all.

- We had our first visitors 'Up North' two sets in fact, good friends and then my sister and her husband
-We discovered a new park
-Mr P turned 30
-M got fantastic SAT's results
-I took the children to London for a week we saw lots of sights and caught up with old friends
- We went on a lovely holiday
-M started secondary school
- The children spoilt me on my birthday
- I met three amazing new friends
-I wasn't seriously injured (or worse) in my accident.
And there were more sunny days, long walks, family dinners and birthdays to share too.

Today we got up early, well earlier than the rest of the holidays, it was dry and the sun was shining for the first time in ages. I went for a walk with the children and Bruno. It was lovely.
Tomorrow the children are back to school, Mr P is back to work and me, well, I'm not. I have forms for the liquidators to fill in to claim my owed wages and a job hunt to start. I'd happily be a SAHM but it doesn't pay the bills, so while I am at home I'm going to try and enjoy it and make everyday count. Now that I've seen that break in the clouds I want try and hold on to that feeling. This year has to be better than the last and maybe, just maybe if I believe good things will happen they will.

May 2012 have more sunshine than clouds

Smile, it confuses people!

Christmas round up.....

Finally today we took down the decorations and cards and returned the house to some level of normality. I love to have it all packed away ready to start the New Year in a clean and tidy house (not counting the children's bedrooms in that, clearly!)
I love making gifts for people. I think it's so much nicer to give something a little more personal than shopping off a wish list of some kind, although they are handy at times! So I thought I'd do an end of year blog and record the gifts that I made for loved ones this Christmas. There are already plans for things I'd like to make people, more food related gifts next year, so long as I'm organised enough.

This year the gifts were either sewn or assembled with love.

There was of course R's quilt, the first one I've ever made.

I'm pleased to say he loved it and declared it to be this years best present!
The girls got note book covers as they're always jotting things down and making lists.

Last year I made several stationary or make-up rolls. They went to the children and Mr P

Last years 'roll's' piled up and ready to go

This was an extra large one for Mr P to hold all the equipment for his studies.

My Niece, who's a midwife, said how handy she would find one for work and I had intended to make her one through the year, but that didn't happen so I made her one for Christmas, along with one for my nephews wife to keep her make-up brushes in.

I wanted to make something for my sister, but didn't think she'd use a make-up roll or a notebook cover so I decided on a stationary wallet as I know she still likes to write and receive letters. I adapted my note book pattern to accommodate envelopes and stamps ad I was quite pleased with the finished product.

Pockets for envelopes and stamps and a larger section containing writing paper and greetings cards

When closed it looks like a notebook

 I also made and embroidered a cushion for my brother and his wife, who this year returned to the UK to live. I can't find a picture of it but it's similar to the ones in my post mentioned above.

I made some super speedy, thrifty gifts for MB's new baby brother. Baby burping cloths made from Ikea guest towels. Simply take a guest towel and decorate with patchwork or felt shapes for an easy baby gift in no time and at very little cost (The towels were a mere 19p each!!!)

My favourite 3 little felt birdies

Bright patchwork

Baby blues stars

 The towels are the perfect size to pop on your shoulder while bringing up wind and prevent your shoulder from getting covered in sicky dribbles! (I've been there!)

Burping cloths ready to be wrapped

They were so quick to make and I'm hoping they were a welcome gift. I know I would have made good use of them especially with babies 2 & 3!

The children's teachers got sticky ginger cupcakes with tiny little candy canes that I made from icing

And then there were the hampers. We have some special people who are a little tricky to buy for, but for whom we wanted a special gift, so I hand selected little luxuries and filled wooden crates made by my lovely Mr P. 

There was a coffee and sweet treats hamper for Mr P's lovely Mum. Special coffee, black cherries in Kirsch, coffee syrup, nice biscuits and luxury cereal were some of her items.

 Mr P's Dad also had a hamper with nice wines, cheeses, crackers, chutneys and a book about the mapping of steam railways, complete with an engine driver cap! (photo? No, lost in cyber space!)

 The hamper above was for the children's Godparents, who happen to be wonderful friends. The idea behind their hamper was a little box (or crate!) of inspiration for those 'what shall we have for dinner?' moments. sachets, jars and spices and of course those little treat items that don't often make it into the weekly shopping trolley

 And last but not least the Chilli lovers hamper, well that's how it started out. This one was for Mr P's sister Lynsey. I started off finding all manner of chilli items (chocolate, crackers, crisps, jam etc) then I spotted Marmite products and Olives and alcohol and all kinds of things that I thought she'd love. I could barely squeeze them all in but with a bit of jiggling and a lot of patience I somehow managed it!

Stack of Hampers

So there it is, my Christmas round up. I've left you with one last shot of Felix, our cat, gazing longingly at the baked Brie. You'll be pleased to know Mr P and I got a new camera for Christmas, so hopefully better pictures on our blogs from now on!
I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas and send you all best wishes for the coming year x

Christmas Tradition

I grew up with a family tradition started by my parents. At 12 noon on Christmas day, we always raised a glass to friends and family who couldn't be with us.
Even as a child I was given a tiny glass of sweet sherry to join in with the toast, a tradition I believe, was started by my parents who got engaged on Christmas day.
It was a toast to friends and loved ones that were no longer with us, or just simply couldn't be with us on that day, even if we were seeing them the next!
A simple idea that where ever we are, we all raise a glass at the same time to toast each other and for that few seconds we are united.
So I'm asking you, my friends & family to join us in a toast tomorrow. Lets carry on this lovely, simple tradition started by two wonderful people

Mum & Dad

Let me know if you're joining in, if you're not, know that I'll be toasting you! Merry Christmas & Best Wishes for 2012 xxx